


Being Us

by weedle_writes_gay_stuff



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/M, Nonbinary Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-02
Updated: 2020-01-02
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:02:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22075897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/weedle_writes_gay_stuff/pseuds/weedle_writes_gay_stuff
Summary: When you’re struggling with your mental health and stressing over your life choices, it’s good to have a bestie on hand who can help. A soft Connverse oneshot with a side of Stevonnie and positive enby vibes, cause I need it.
Relationships: Connie Maheswaran/Steven Universe
Comments: 6
Kudos: 104





	Being Us

Steven’s heart raced as he checked his phone and saw the text from Connie, reading ‘coming up to the temple now’. How long had it been since they’d gotten to hang out? Not long after she started studying for her exams, he knew that much. And it was only just sinking in how bad he’d missed her.

His ears pricked up at the knock at the door, and he got up hastily to open it for her. To his surprise, her ‘hey, Steven!’ was accompanied by her opening her arms to invite him for a hug, which was an offer he gladly took. The two of them giggled happily, and Steven led her inside.

‘So, uh, how are things going?’ Connie asked. Steven tried not to let his face fall. ‘I heard about you leaving Little Homeschool,’ she added, quickly commenting, ‘I’m sorry it was making you feel like it wasn’t worth it.’

Steven could tell she was worried about sounding accusatory, and said in response, ‘Thanks for understanding.’ There was a pause, and he noticed Connie’s foot tapping awkwardly. ‘Uh, I hope school’s going alright with you. If you want my help, I’ll see what I can do.’

‘The studying’s going alright, actually,’ Connie answered. ‘I get distracted sometimes, but I think I’m kinda learning what I need to learn.’

‘That’s good then,’ Steven smiled. He took a moment to get out the next thing he wanted to say, thinking she deserved to hear it. ‘I’m proud of you, Connie.’

She blushed a little, and grinned, saying ‘Thanks, Steven.’ Digging her hand into one of the cushions anxiously, Connie said slowly, ‘Um... is it OK if I talk about something that’s kinda bothering me?’

‘Of course! I always wanna help you if I can,’ Steven grinned, trying to hold back a beaming smile in case she got the wrong impression.

‘Aww, thanks,’ Connie chuckled a little. ‘I guess it’s kinda silly, but like... lately, even though school’s going fine, I’ve kinda felt on edge with my parents. I don’t argue with them, but sometimes they just say things that make me uncomfortable and I dunno how to deal with them. Is it OK if I talk to you about em?’

‘Anytime,’ Steven smiled, still anxious his expression seemed cloying- or worse, he thought, fake.

‘Well, the biggest thing is kind of TMI, so if you want me to stop, just say,’ added Connie nervously.

‘I won’t mind, I promise,’ Steven said firmly.

‘If you’re sure,’ Connie replied. ‘Feel free to stop me if you change your mind, OK?’ Steven nodded. ‘So, um... a few days ago...’ She blushed, but Steven’s comforting expression encouraged her to come out and say it. ‘...I got my period, and it felt horrible. Not just like, it hurt, but I felt gross for having it. And I told mom, and all she said was, it’s just part of becoming a woman. I just wanted to yell at her, don’t say stuff like that to me! It just makes me feel worse about who I am! Like, I’m 15, I’m not even close to being a woman! I dunno if I even want to be one!’ She clammed up, feeling like maybe she’d said too much, and added shyly, ‘does that make any sense?’

‘Of course it does,’ Steven replied. ‘Your mom’s not even right- Gems never have that, but some of them are women, aren’t they?’

‘Exactly!’ Connie answered. ‘And some of them aren’t women, and people are cool with that!’ She slumped a little, and Steven shuffled up to her softly. ‘Sometimes, I wish I was a Gem,’ Connie added.

Those words hit Steven like a freight train, and he felt a weird pang of discomfort in his chest. He looked away from Connie shyly, and sighed quietly. ‘I kinda know how you feel,’ he mumbled.

‘Huh?’ Connie sat up and put a hand on his shoulder softly.

‘Never mind,’ said Steven, trying to withdraw into himself.

‘Steven, please. You can tell me,’ Connie protested.

Steven huddled into himself, but after a few seconds finally said, ‘OK.’ He tried to muster the words to say what he felt, and started rambling, fairly certain he was being really incoherent. ‘I guess it’s like, I just don’t feel like I fit in with the Gems, not just the Crystal Gems, any of the Gems, cause at least they all have things they’re good at and know who they want to be. And even the humans I know seem to know what they want and how to do it, and I feel like I’m just sitting here not moving forward!’ He barely noticed his skin starting to glow pink. ‘And whenever I think about mom, all the things she did, how much she hurt people, I wonder if I’m just like her, I’m just gonna hurt everyone all over again!’

‘Steven, it’s OK, it’s OK!’ Connie protested, hugging him to her tightly. In her comforting grip, he hugged back, and the pink hue around him slowly faded. The emotional strife that had caused it was still bubbling inside him, but he tried to focus on his wonderful friend trying to support him like this.

‘Thanks,’ he mumbled. ‘Thanks for letting me say all that.’

‘Of course,’ replied Connie softly.

‘You know something else?’ he added. ‘I kinda know how you feel about what you said about wanting to be a Gem, but for me, it’s like... in reverse? Sometimes I don’t wanna be a Gem. If I was a human, maybe I’d understand people better. If I was totally a Gem, I might know what I like doing and what I wanna do with myself more. But with how I am, I just- I almost feel like a freak.’

Hearing Steven use that word to describe himself made something in Connie snap. She pulled him to face her, and said insistently, ‘Steven, you’re not a freak for being half-human and half-Gem! You’re awesome!’ Steven blushed hard. ‘You’re wonderful, and sweet, and one of the most amazing people I’ve ever known. Being part-Gem doesn’t make you wrong, it’s one of the things that makes you so right!’

Steven hugged her again, and felt like he was gonna cry. ‘Thanks, Connie,’ he mumbled. ‘Thanks for being there for me. I’ve missed you so bad.’

‘Aww, I missed you too,’ Connie smiled, blushing herself as his hands moved up to her head and started to stroke her hair.

‘Uh, Connie?’ he said, smiling shyly at her as they broke off their hug. ‘Can I say you’re really pretty?’

‘Of course!’ Connie giggled. ‘I think you’re really pretty too!’ The two of them looked at each other nervously, blushing and feeling their hearts racing. She brushed her hands against Steven’s and smiled as he took them. Awkwardly, they cuddled up again, and she was surprised to feel Steven’s lips touch hers before she got the chance to make the first move. She kissed back eagerly anyway, and the two of them huddled softly.

They exchanged a few more messy kisses, and then Steven pulled back, a big grin on his face. ‘What are you thinking of?’ asked Connie teasingly.

‘I just realized something,’ Steven replied. ‘We don’t have to be who people tell us to be if we don’t want to. We don’t have to be a boy, or a girl, or a human, or a Gem.’

‘I think I get what you mean,’ Connie giggled, and as the two continued cuddling and giggled, Steven’s gem started to glow. The two giggles slowly blended into one, and the pink light shone through the room for a few seconds.

When they opened their eyes, they sat up with a wonderful sense of euphoria in their mind. ‘I almost forgot how much I love being me,’ Stevonnie chuckled to themself, standing up and walking to the bathroom contentedly.

What they saw in the mirror made their eyes shine like stars and a beaming grin spread across their face. They had a cute little stubbly face, perfectly complimenting their fluffy shoulder-length hair and the cute black star print crop top and white shirt they wore as a top. ‘I’m pretty,’ they said to themself.  
‘Of course you’re pretty! Being pretty isn’t just for girls!’ they giggled.

Leaving the bathroom, they sat down on the sofa and turned on the TV, hugging themself contentedly as they did. ‘Hmm, what to watch?’ they pondered. Suddenly, looking down, they noticed something.  
‘Hey, Pupcopter: Sky-High Adventure! I’ve wanted to see this for ages!’ they grinned.  
‘Isn’t it for little kids, though?’ they considered for a moment.  
‘Ah, if it cheers you up, there’s nothing wrong with watching something for kids,’ they smiled, and as they started to watch it, not only did they enjoy it, they realized they felt all the better for letting go of what was ‘adult’ and just doing what they wanted.

About 90 minutes later, they yawned hard as the credits rolled. ‘I think I need a rest,’ they mumbled, curling up happily on the sofa and putting a pillow behind their head.  
‘I’ve missed being me so much,’ they smiled. ‘Night, Stevonnie.’  
‘Night, Stevonnie,’ they echoed to themself, giggling, and dozed off with a smirk etched across their face.

*

Garnet came in with groceries about half an hour later. Her future vision had served her well- it seemed like getting hold of ingredients for pancakes was a good idea after all. She saw the pretty fusion snoozing on the sofa, and smiled almost as broadly as she had the first time she’d ever seen them. As she quietly put things away in the fridge, she couldn’t help but look at the sleeping Stevonnie now and again.

It was a relief to know Steven had found someone he felt comfortable opening up to, even if it wasn’t the Gems, and she was proud of him for being so caring to Connie in a way few Gems can care for humans. And she’d be lying if she said it wasn’t wonderful to see Stevonnie again at last.


End file.
